December 31, 2003

hello

I am not dead

December 16, 2003

December 15, 2003

Preaching

This Sunday I had the privelege of filling pulpit at the United Church of Morocco.

For those of you who don't know, this is something that I do every time I get a chance. It started several years ago, when I started preaching at the Rescue Mission in Danville, IL every Thursday night. I did that for nearly a year, and then I got married, and my job changed starting times, so I had to quit.

Since then I have filled pulpit at Edgewood Baptist Church in Danville, IL, First Baptist Church in Covington, IN, Central Baptist Church in Iron Mountain, MI, and now The United Church of Morocco in Morocco, IN. I have to say that of all the things that I enjoy, preaching is the one that I enjoy the most. There are no other times in my life that I am as emptied of myself as when I am preaching. I absolutely love it!

I have even considered on many occasions becoming a youth Pastor. But I don't know about that! Alot of things would have to fall into place before that happens! But never-the-less, I think that I would enjoy it immensely!!

December 13, 2003

Lonely

When your wife is out of town for 10 days it is easy to get a little lonely.

In fact, I have been so lonely that I have found reasons to stay at the school as late as I can. The earliest that I have been home is 8:00. And at least three weekdays I have been the last person to leave the building.

But I have to be honest, It is less about going home to an empty house, and more about going home to Willow! Willow, my hairless cat, is pregnant. She is very lonely right now, too! I can hear her before I open the door. She is in there crying for me! The first couple of days it was ok. I would pet her for awhile, but then she wouldn't leave me alone. She is driving me crazy!

My family is coming back either today or tomorrow, depending on the weather. And once they are here, I will be whole again! (And I won't have to pet that stupid cat anymore!)

December 10, 2003

Your Ambition!

Sometimes it is easy to wonder what you should do with your life.

Well, let me give you a good starting place. (Actually, let Paul give you a good starting place.)


"Make it your ambition
to lead a quiet life,
to mind your own business
and to work with your hands,
just as we told you,
so that your daily life
may win the respect of outsiders
and so that you will not
be dependent on anybody."
- I Thess. 4:11-12


This by no means answers it all, but if you are not doing these things, then you are not even close!

December 8, 2003

Chosen

I can still remember it like it was yesterday... PE class -- Picking teams for Basketball or Football (or any other sport for that matter). We would begin by doing the typical lineup. First the captains would be chosen by the teacher. And then the elimination process would begin.

The captains would begin by choosing the obvious ones. This is the most crucial part of the team picking process. These first-chosen-ones were the real determiners of the outcome of whatever the competition of the day was. They were those elite few that could perform dazzling miracles with their athletic prowess. These few would be snatched up at lightning speed -- Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! They are all picked, leaving the rest of us in bewildered amazement. Then the excitement would begin to build as we eagerly anticipated the possibilities of the forming teams. While the elite were being picked, you could hear different vocal sounds of "yes!" and "oh yeah, baby!" or "dude!" by the new fellow teammates. At the same time there are exclaimations of "aw, man!" and "crud!" or "dude!" coming from the other team. ("Dude!" is an exclaimation that has many possibilities. Depending on the how the emphasis is placed on the different vowels or consanants.)

And then there would be the other athletes. These do not fall into the elite category, but they are still able to perform their required function. These team members are chosen with a little more hesitation, as the captains confer with their chosen elite force. One by one, the rest are picked away. Finally the picking is done... or is it?

Every player is ready to start the game. They are wanting to walk away and get set up, deciding who is going to guard who, and what plays need to be run. The strategies are being set into motion based on the opposition. But wait! There are still a few players standing there.

Now if any of you readers have ever been in this position, you know that there is almost nothing that feels worse than being chosen last. Being chosen last is hurtful and humiliating. I think though that the hurt what hurts is less about the order of choosing, and more about the motive of the choosing. And when you know that someone chose you out of obligation, it is not a pleasant feeling.

Like when you are getting a lab partner, and you see the look on your new partner's face when they find out it will be you they are working with for the durartion of the project... not a good feeling!

Now don't get me wrong, in and of itself, there is nothing wrong with obligation. What makes the obligation bad is when it is not received with open arms! Let me give you an example: I have two sons -- I had no idea what I was going to get when they came along. I did not get to see a line-up of children and get to pick the ones on my team. They were stuck there. There is without a doubt an obligation to take care of and love these children. In the case with children, the obligation doesn't diminish the value of the love, especially when the parent treats the child like they were a gift that they didn't deserve to receive.

I have observed this in my classes. There is always that one sweet girl, or that one kind-hearted guy, that will be excited no matter who they are put with! They receive each new person in their lives like they are the most valued player on the team! People like that are rare, and I believe that there is a great reward awaiting them.

But I still can't get away from my past. Most of the time, I found myself in that last group. Standing around, looking down at my feet. Fortunately, I was buddies with all of the elite, so they wouldn't leave me to the very end, unless they were mad at me for something. But that "chosen solely out of obligation" feeling has always lingered.

I don't like those situations where I am only there because of someone's supposed obligation. If you don't really, really want me there, don't invite me! And especially don't act like you want me around, when you really don't. I can see right through that, just like most other people. Social settings when people invite you because they don't want to offend you, ugh! That just puts a bad taste in my mouth!

But man, it feels good to get chosen. When students come to me because they feel that I will be understanding. When coworkers want me to be their partner, because they know that I will give my best, while making the work a little easier to bear. When I am asked to do something silly because the students think that I am funny. When my boss chooses me to take the heavy responsibility, be the crew leader or the driver, because they know that I will do a good job, and will give it my best. When students or others come to me for spiritual advice or Biblical wisdom, because they have trust that God is working in my life, and they know they will get a truthful, practical answer. When When my boys isolate me in a crowd, and yell "daddy!" When my family gets excited to hear when I am coming home for the day, because to them, I make the day! When my wife chooses me above all others, prefers my company, my personality... To know that there is a this person that would, regardless of obligation, want to spend her time, life, and energy with me -- now that's good! Nothing feels better than to be chosen!

Honey, I choose you, and thanks for continuing to choose me, even when you don't have to.

December 4, 2003

I Pledge My Head To Heaven

Well, I pledge my head to heaven for the Gospel,
And I ask no man on Earth to fill my needs.
Like the sparrow up above, I am enveloped in His love,
And I trust Him like those little ones, He feeds.

Well I pledge my wife to heaven, for the Gospel,
Though our love each passing day just seems to grow.
As I told her when we wed, I'd surely rather be found dead,
Than to love her more than the one who saved my soul.

I'm your child, and I want to be in your family forever.
I'm your child, and I'm going to follow you,
No matter whatever the cost, I'm gonna count all things lost.

Well I pledge my sons to heaven for the gospel.
Though they're kicked and beaten, ridiculed and scorned.
I will teach them to rejoice, and lift a thankful praising voice,
And to be like Him who bore the nails and crown of thorns.

I'm your child, and I want to be in your family forever.
I'm your child, and I'm going to follow you,
No matter whatever the cost, I'm gonna count all things lost.
Oh no matter whatever the cost, I'm gonna count all things lost.
Well I've had the chance to gain the world, and to live just like a king,
But without your love, it doesn't mean a thing.

Oh no matter whatever the cost, I'm gonna count all things lost,
Oh no matter whatever the cost, I'm gonna count all things lost.
Well I pledge my sons, I pledge my wife, I pledge my head to heaven,
I pledge my sons, I pledge my wife,
I pledge my head to heaven, for the gospel.

--Keith Green

November 27, 2003

Turkey Day!

I am at my relative's house, eatin' turkey...

What are you doing?

November 26, 2003

fallen

The soldier slumped to one knee. He was wounded and he was tired. But he was not just tired from the day's battle, which was far from over, but from the war itself. It seemed that his whole life he had been about this war. Don't misunderstand, it was a war that he knew needed to be fought, there was no doubt about that, but this war had enveloped his whole life. And he was tired of it, soul-tired.

There was a lull in the battle, the main excursion had moved to other parts of the field, which had given the soldier a moment to contemplate. But he knew it was worthless to contemplate for long. The enemy would be back, they were strong and fierce, and without fear.

He attempted to rise, using his sword as a cane. He knew that he needed to get back on his feet because the ground was beginning to tremble from the onrush of the barbarian horde. Once he was standing, he straightened his back, and popped his neck a couple of times. There was the smell of death in the air. For the first time in this war he wasn't so sure that he was going to survive.

The first of the barbarians came over the hilltop. It was still some distance away, so he took this last moment to briefly examine his wounds. He wasn't sure why he was doing this, he knew there was no possibility of leaving the front lines and heading for the physician's tents. There were a few nicks and cuts along his arms and legs. He knew those would heal, he had the scars to prove it. There was one long slash across his chest. That one happened when he let his guard down to assist a fallen sword-brother. If it had been just a little bit deeper, he knew that he wouldn't be examining it now.

The enemy let loose an onslaught of arrows. Without thinking, he kneeled down and raised his large shield over his head as they rained down. He had been in battle enough that every movement was performed with near perfect precision, without hesitation. He heard the arrows falling like large hailstones, all around him, and a couple on top of his shield. He heard a scream from one young soldier, where an arrow had undoubtedly found its mark.

As the last of the arrows fell, the soldier rose again. He prepared his mind and his soul to rush, once again, into near certain death. He heard a 'woosh' from behind him as the bows of his own archers released their deadly missiles. As soon as the arrows had passed, he took that first step to rush headlong into the enemy. His men instinctively followed. As one force they flowed down the hill like an avalanche to meet their foes, maybe for the last time. He could see the details of their faces now, rushing at a maddening pace towards him. Many of them fell because of the accuracy of his archers. And when the forces met, there was a sound like thunder and the sound of metal on metal filled the air.

He adjusted his course slightly so that he was headed straight toward their chief. He had already slew two of the enemy, but he knew that he needed to make it to the chief. He had seen an enemy scatter because of the loss of their leader enough times to know that this was their greatest hope. He fought his way to the chieftain, working his arms with precision, like a reaper, mowing his way through a field. It was exhilarating! He set himself to the task with a slight smile on his face. He hacked and hewed his way closer and closer. He approached so quickly that he even thought that the chieftain was making his way towards him!

The soldier met him on the top of a small hill, and there they fought. No other soldier or barbarian dared to step too close to this battle within the battle. With everything going on around them, they fought. Both grinning at the other, they fought. But the soldier was stronger. He had a power that the other lacked.

The soldier stood over the fallen foe. He was preparing to finish him off, when he was suddenly knocked off balance. He whirled around to face this attacker, but there was none there, only a sharp pain from where he had been hit. He turned back and attempted to raise his sword, but was unable to lift it high.

The soldier knew it then. He had been struck with an arrow. One deadly marker had found its spot, neatly between his shoulder blades... He had been shot in the back. One zealous archer had continued to release the deadly projectiles, felling both friend and foe alike. The soldier brought down his sword, swiftly finishing his job, his purpose.

He slumped down again, fallen in battle.

November 23, 2003

Hasn't this happend before?

It is interesting how it seems the same things are happening to me all of the time.

For example, I was really looking forward to going to the stewardship banquet this year. We have been talking about stewardship all this month, in our classes and in the services, and it has gotten me to thinking about the whole concept of stewarship. I also heard that the speaker was supposed to be really good. But probably the most important thing is that I had been looking forward to sending the kids to the nursery for a few hours, and going to this thing with my lovely wife.

But sure enough, about one week ago Josiah gets a cold, which develops into a worse cold, which evenntually turns into something called "croup." No problem, that should only last a few days, and even if he still has it, no croupy cough is going to keep us from going out! Then comes Sunday morning. Samuel, who never feels sick enough to not want to go to church, tells us he is not feeling well. (And if you have been around us long enough, you will know that if our boys are feeling like they are sick to their stomach, it is not going to be pretty.) I end up heading off to church by myself. While in our ABF (Adult Bible Fellowship) I start to feel a little weak and shaky. It progresses all of the way home, until I am at home feeling a little weak and shaky. Then about 15 minutes after I get home, I find myself holding a big orange bowl while Sam is puking his guts out. (not pleasant, especially when you are feeling weak and shaky) Now, I am not going to go into detail right now about the great dramas that our sick kids have put us through, but I will tell you that in the midst of that moment, I suddenly had this feeling of "I've been here before."

To make a long story short, we ended up missing the banquet, because of our sick kids. (I know that's happened before!) But all I can say is, "Oh well!"

I will have to admit at times like these doing right doesn't seem like it has a great pay-off. Sometimes it seems that being a family man and doing the right thing, just leads to days like these. And in many ways that is true. And I've had many "days like these." Doing right isn't all cinnabons and rose gardens! Doing right is holding puke bowls. It's changing diapers. It's playing old games. It's rubbing a back or forehead. It's administering medicine. It's working long and sleeping short. It's caring for sick people and pretending you feel fine, even when you don't. It's smiling when you're sad, giving when you need, and being strong when you're weak. Doing right is hard, but there's nothing like it in all the world.

Everyone knows there are some eternal rewards for doing right, but it is easy to forget that there are also some temporal rewards, too. There is no better way to have a good night's rest, one of peace. Because when you aren't doing right, there is no peace! There is also no greater joy, when right has been chosen in your life, and has been followed through. God knew when he made us that in order for us to have any form of happiness, it had to be through the avenue of right!

This was meant to be a blog on how it seems that my kids get sick everytime that there is a big event that I want to go to. Instead it has made me remember even as I was typing it, that the banquet was no great loss in the long run. Instead, I received another chance to love my family. Though not at the stewardship banquet, I still was challenged on the topic of stewardship. I hope that I was a good and faithful steward today.

Personality Abnormalities #2

Mr. Know-It-All

You know what I am talking about. Have you ever met someone who is always right. Even when they are wrong, they are right in their own mind. They go into every situation having already ruled out every other opinion, because it isn't theirs. And how could anybody else possibley know enough to have any valuable input on the situation.

They have input on everything because they have been there and done that! There is nothing out of the scope of their knowledge, or so you would think, if you were to listen to them. Pick a topic, they have a comment, and to them it is the absolute most important comment you are going to hear for a very long time.

When you talk to Mr. Know-It-All, he never really listens to you. If you watch his face closely, you will find that the entire time that others are talking, Mr. Know-It-All is formulating his next statement. Ususally it is a way to prove you wrong, even if you aren't currently disagreeing about anything.

Most of the time Mr. Know-It-All is in his own little world. He has to stay there because that is really the only place where he actually knows anything, and where anybody will actually listen to him. You see, in the real world, Mr. Know-It-All doesn't actually know all that much. In fact he is usually wrong most of the time.

The sad thing is that if there is a Mr. Know-It-All that is reading this blog right now, they are probably nodding their head in agreement, and have come up with something to comment about already. In fact, it is probably the most important comment about a "Mr. Know-It-All's" that I have failed mention. Well, Mr. Know-It-All, let me have it, what did I leave out?

November 22, 2003

Blogging... Nah!

I don't know about you, but I am getting ready to eat a piece of pumpkin pie and watch a movie with my wife. I don't have time to blog. sorry.

November 21, 2003

GODLINESS + CONTENTMENT = GREAT GAIN

"Godliness deals with who I am; contentment deals with what I have. Godliness is being unsatisfied with my character formation in God, and contentment is being satisfied with what I possess in God. Together they add up to great gain.

-- James MacDonald

November 19, 2003

Paradoxical Passages #2

This is the first passage in the Bible that I really read. I mean REALLY! I had looked in the Bible lots of times. But I had never really read it. Note the verse that says "even the demons also believe and tremble." That word believe is the same word that you find in John 3:16.

What good is it, my brothers, if a man claims to have faith but has no deeds? Can such faith save him? ... faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead.

But someone will say, "You have faith; I have deeds."
Show me your faith without deeds, and I will show you my faith by what I do.
You believe that there is one God. Good! Even the demons believe that–and shudder.

You foolish man, do you want evidence that faith without deeds is useless? Was not our ancestor Abraham considered righteous for what he did when he offered his son Isaac on the altar? You see that his faith and his actions were working together, and his faith was made complete by what he did. And the scripture was fulfilled that says, "Abraham believed God, and it was credited to him as righteousness," and he was called God's friend.

You see that a person is justified by what he does and not by faith alone.
In the same way, was not even Rahab the prostitute considered righteous for what she did when she gave lodging to the spies and sent them off in a different direction?

As the body without the spirit is dead, so faith without deeds is dead.

- James 2:14-26


This passage had me stumped for a long time. To the best of my understanding, this is telling us that it is possible to have a fake faith. And the only way to tell is whether or not you are doing something about this faith. Real faith produces a changed life.

November 11, 2003

Dad

One of my biggest regrets is not going into the military. It never fails, every time there is a Veteran's Day Chapel, or Memorial Day... 4th of July... etc. Anything patriotic stirs up feelings of regret.

One possible reason that I regret not joining the military could be that I truly respect those who have fought in the military. I honor their decision to join when they were able to. And many of them are truly respectable people. Maybe it is because of their service that they are respectable, or maybe it is usually the respectable people that join up. It is quite possibly a little bit of both.

Another possibility is that I have a deep desire to be pleasing to my dad. My dad was (and always will be) a marine. He is a Vietnam War Veteran, and proud of it. And I have to say that I am too. I still consider joining the reserves. I just recently found out that they will still accept you up to the age of 35. If I could work it into my summer schedule, I would do it. Growing up, (even though there were many times that I was frustrated and mad at my dad) I can say that I have never been ashamed of him. In many ways I still want to be like him. And I think that I partly regret not going into the military, because I still want him to be proud of me (not that he isn't proud of me) but all of the hardship would be worth the reward of the praise of the father.

Whatever the case, I regret not being a part of it all. I do think that it flows over into my desire to gain the praise of my heavenly father. To one day stand before him and hear him say, "well done! You've fought the good fight!"

I still have 4 years to decide. Maybe one of these summers I will find myself in some boot camp, making my dad proud! But until then I am going to try my best to make him (and my heavenly father) proud of me.

November 10, 2003

Urban Legend!

It has been long thought that Yellow Dye #5 has certain side-effects... But according to the Mountain Dew's Q&A page, that is simply not true! ...so drink on! Do the Dew! Slurp that Mountain Dew down.

consider others

"If you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any fellowship with the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and purpose. Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others. Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus." -- Phil. 2:1-5

November 6, 2003

good?

Thanks to following the blog of the cynical tyrant, I found a link that would rate how good or evil my site is...

Well, here are the results--


hmmm... Does this mean that my site is 38% evil?

November 4, 2003

Paradoxical Passages #1

I am going to start another series. I will try not to have them on the same day again. I have just felt like bloggin today. My mind is reeling. This series is something that has been in my head for a long time. There are several verses in the Bible that I am not quite sure what they mean, but they are both convictingf and frightening. Many of these verses seem to contradict other places in the Bible. But God's word is inspired, so there is no contradiction. Some might say that we need to seek to find the answer to these supposed contradictions. I would disagree. Here is a quote from John MacArthur that goes right along with what I would say,

Because we cannot stand the tension of mystery, paradox, or antinomy, we are inclined to adjust what the Bible teaches so that it will fit our own systems of order and consistency. But that presumptuous approach is unfaithful to God's Word and leads to confused doctrine and weakened living. It should be noted that other essential scriptural doctrines are also apparently paradoxical to our limited capacity. It is antinomous that Scripture itself is the work of human authors, yet the very words of God; that Jesus Christ is fully God and fully man; that salvation is forever, yet saints must remain obedient and persevere to the end; that the Christian’s life is lived in total commitment and discipline of self, yet is all of Christ. Such inscrutable truths are en encouragement that the mind of God infinitely surpasses the mind of man and are a great proof of the divine authorship of Scripture. Humans writing a Bible on their own would have attempted to resolve such problems.

Well, with all of that said, I am going to give you my first passage:

Paradoxical Passages #1

If we deliberately keep on sinning after we have received the knowledge of the truth, no sacrifice for sins is left, but only a fearful expectation of judgment and of raging fire that will consume the enemies of God. Anyone who rejected the law of Moses died without mercy on the testimony of two or three witnesses. How much more severely do you think a man deserves to be punished who has trampled the Son of God under foot, who has treated as an unholy thing the blood of the covenant that sanctified him, and who has insulted the Spirit of grace? For we know him who said, "It is mine to avenge; I will repay," and again, "The Lord will judge his people." It is a dreadful thing to fall into the hands of the living God. -- Heb. 10:26 - 31

A convicting passage; one that urges me to stay on my toes. I don't know if I could explain all of the ins and outs of this passage theologically, but I don't want to be the man who keeps on deliberately sinning.

Personality Abnormalities #1

I have decided to start a new series of personality types that could drive a sane person crazy. I can think of three or four right off of the top of my head. But I will force myself to save them for later. Today I will give you the first type.

Personality Abnormalities #1
The "That's nothin'!" guy -- This personality is the type that feels that they need to give some input on everything. If they are in the room, you know it. They are probably putting down someone's story, with one of their own. They ususally start each and every sentence with the phrase, "That's nothin'!" Another name for this personality type is: A "one-upper"

I chose this one first, because I have mentioned these types all of the time in my classes. My intention is not to dislike the people that have these traits. I find if amusing to talk about these types, but it would be wrong to dislike the person. Anybody that we encounter we should show them the Love of Christ, no matter what type of personality they have.

Fate

Quote: "As punishment for my contempt for Authority, Fate has made me an authority myself." - Albert Einstein

Examples: Some things that I have encountered recently in my job, which all relate to the above quote.

A couple of weeks ago I gave a student Demerits for doing donuts in the parking lot... hmmm...

Last Friday a student showed me a comic strip that he had drawn that included charicatures of me... hmmm...

Today I didn't collect an assignment that was due at the beginning of class. About half way through the class I asked if anyone was currently working on the assignment. Sure enough, there was a student who fessed up... hmmm...

There truly is nothing new under the sun.

November 3, 2003

The Minnesota Crime Commission wrote:

Every baby starts life as a little savage. He is completely selfish and self-centered. He wants what he wants when he wants it: his bottle, his mother's attention, his playmate's toys, his uncle's watch, or whatever. Deny him these and he seethes with rage and aggressiveness which would be murderous were he not so helpless. He's dirty, he has no morals, no knowledge, no developed skills. This means that all children, not just certain children but all children, are born delinquent. If permitted to continue in their self-centered world of infancy, given free reign to their impulsive actions to satisfy each want, every child would grow up a criminal, a thief, a killer, a rapist.

October 31, 2003

my wife

14 years ago today,
  I met my girlfriend,

my highschool sweetie,
  my best friend,
my maker of memories and
  my sharer of memories,
my co-laborer and
  my co-dreamer,
my soulmate and
  my compensate,
my fulfiller and completer,
  my help-meet,
  my counselor,
    my lover,
    my heart,
      my soul,
      my strength,

my wife

October 26, 2003

lonely in the midst

Have you ever felt all alone? Even when you are around people. I think that if we were honest, we have all felt that way one time or another.

Loneliness is interesting. What defines if we are lonely? I mean, I have been aboslutely alone before, and the feelings of loneliness were far, far away. And then I could be in the middle of a group of people, not alone at all, and not had the slightest feeling of loneliness. Being alone does not make us lonely.

Well then, what is it? There are many in this world that feel alone all of the time. They feel as if they are on a deserted island, with nobody there to talk to. They mull through their day, with their plastic smiles on and nobody would know it, but they think that they are alone.

I know that when I feel the loneliest, it is usually when I think that noone is really understanding what I am going through. I feel like I as sending up signal flares and strarting big bonfires, and the passing ships don't even take notice of it. I am too far away. My signals are insignificant in the big ocean that I am stranded in. I am left alone with my imaginary friends.

But look around. Look out of your own loneliness island. You might see another signal flare coming from not that far away. When we are feeling lonely, we are never alone. We have all been there. You might find that right on your same island, there is someone else feeling stranded. In fact, you might find an entire city of lonely people living on YOUR loneliness island.

October 24, 2003

wired

The school has now gone online. because of that I will be trying to make my personal page look a little better. I am new at the whole website construction thing, so it might take awhile for it to start looking nice.

I have also figured out how to add a pic to my blog. So as with anything new, I will probably overuse it for awhile, before I find a good balance.

can't talk anymore now.

October 22, 2003

blogs

I don't normally just put in a commentary style blog, but I think that I am going to give it a good healthy attempt today.

I just finished reading several blogs of people that I don't know. Some of them were quite interesting. I love to see what the different titles are, and how people choose to describe themselves.

Sometimes it is difficult to read other people's blogs because you don't know anything about them. Some people write very extensive blogs, and it always seems like they are better bloggers, just because they have more to say. (That is why I am trying to write such an extensive blog today.)

I have also noticed that this blog thing is addictive. I am constantly thinking about what I could blog about. Most of the time it is something ridiculous. I would like to think that there are a few good ones in there too. (Like the ones about Son 1, or the poems about my wife.)

I would like to blog more, but it seems that sometimes my schedule is a little too constrictive for very extensive blogging. For example, this last week was very hectic...

  • On Monday, I had meetings at the school all day.
  • Soccer practice Monday evening.
  • Tuesday, was the last Junior High Soccer game. We spent several hours in the bus, to sit and wait for our game, which when the game started, it also started raining and sleeting. The game was canceled. We ate at Burger King (which lets the bus driver eat for free) on the way back. We didn't get back until late.
  • Wednesday was the last day of teaching the Faith Bible Institute Computer class. I enjoyed teaching that class, but I am glad that the responsibility is over.
  • Thursday, Love's Dad went into the Hospital. The guy is never sick, but when he is it is a doozie! Thursday night I had the kids by myself, while they were in their usual fun mood, I tried to get some work done.
  • Friday was the end of the quarter.
  • I gave an Algebra II test on Friday.
  • Bible projects were due on Friday.
  • Love went to see her Dad again on Friday (at this time they thought that he had SARS or West Nile Virus). She spent the night at the hospital Friday night.
  • I also drove the children to visit with Grammy so I could try to get some work done (you know, grades and such).
  • Saturday I had to help with the administration of the PSAT's.
  • I spent the rest of the day at McDonald's studying for the two sermons that I had to preach at Edgewood Baptist Church on Sunday.
  • I also had to enter all of my grades into the computer.
  • On Sunday, I woke up early, drove to Illinois, I preached, then I studied, then I preached.
  • Then I drove an hour with my two little ones, while listening to veggie tales the whole way, just to get back home.
  • Monday, I tried to finish up the grading that I had to do, and get prepared for classes.
  • Love went to see her dad again on Monday. By this time they thought that he had Anthrax poisoning.
  • I tried to work with the kids in the house, but it didn't go well.
  • All of the grades had to be finished by Tuesday at 8:00 am, and turned in, to the office.
  • I was being observed by Mrs. Sutherland (one of the best teachers in the world) on Tuesday, and I still had to finish entering the grades in.
  • Everything kind of slid together...
  • Love's dad came home, because the insurance company didn't want to pay any longer. He ended up with some disease that I have never heard of.

And now here I am, with so much to do that I just want to blog instead of doing any work.

Oh well...

Psalm 15 & 36

Psalm 15

"LORD,

who may dwell in your sanctuary?
Who may live on your holy hill?

He whose walk is blameless
and who does what is righteous,

who speaks the truth from his heart
and has no slander on his tongue,

who does his neighbor no wrong
and casts no slur on his fellowman,

who despises a vile man
but honors those who fear the LORD,

who keeps his oath even when it hurts,

who lends his money without usury
and does not accept a bribe against the innocent.

He who does these things will never be shaken."


Always a convicting Psalm...

Here is one more Psalm

Psalm 36

An oracle is within my heart concerning the sinfulness of the wicked:

There is no fear of God before his eyes.
For in his own eyes he flatters himself too much
to detect or hate his sin.

The words of his mouth are wicked and deceitful;
he has ceased to be wise and to do good.
Even on his bed he plots evil;
he commits himself to a sinful course
and does not reject what is wrong.

Your love, O LORD, reaches to the heavens,
your faithfulness to the skies.

Your righteousness is like the mighty mountains,
your justice like the great deep.

O LORD, you preserve both man and beast.

How priceless is your unfailing love!
Both high and low among men
find refuge in the shadow of your wings.

They feast on the abundance of your house;
you give them drink from your river of delights.
For with you is the fountain of life;
in your light we see light.

Continue your love to those who know you,
your righteousness to the upright in heart.
May the foot of the proud not come against me,
nor the hand of the wicked drive me away.
See how the evildoers lie fallen-
thrown down, not able to rise!


Both excellent Psalms. I hope that they have encouraged you. I know that they have encouraged me this day.

October 19, 2003

comments, please

You can now comment on each of my entries separately. I would love to hear your comments.

October 17, 2003

Bloggin

(To the tune of Truckin' by the Grateful Dead)

Bloggin' I got my words typed in,
Keep bloggin' like the dew-dah man
Together, write more or less a line
Just keep bloggin' on

I sit down and let all of my thoughts spill out
My fingers move, not quite sure to where-a-bouts,
I let them clickety-clack while my brain breathes out
Look at me now - pop - another gray hair

Bloggin', like the dew-dah man
Once told me "You got to blog your mind
Sometimes those thoughts ain't worth a dime
If you don't write 'em down"

Sometimes, the good times all fallin' on me
Other times, I'm on the bad-time sea
Lately, it occurs to me
What a long, strange trip it's been

What in the world, ever became of free time
No study hall, not a minute called mine
Unless they all leave, to go work for Troy Grimes
Another bell rings, oh, ain't it a shame

Bloggin', up to my elbows
Been thinkin' you got to mellow slow
It takes time; you pick a place to grow
And just keep bloggin' on

Sittin' and starin' at the "to-do list" again
Too many things to type a blog refrain
but inspiration comes, no matter what the time
spew it out and get back to work again


Busted, down in the MRC again
Set up, a sneaky hall monitor grin
Knocked down, your blog's alookin' thin
They just won't let you be

{Refrain}
Bloggin', I'm a goin' home
Whoa, whoa baby, back where I belong
Back home, sit down and edit my groans
And get back bloggin' on

(these words are adjusted from a song I used to know)

October 15, 2003

Thank You!

I would like to thank you all for your support. Because you are the ones who have made this possible.

On Oct. 1, I had 69 page views in one day. And on oct. 8, I had 57 pageviews. I have a grand total of 644 pageviews since the beginning of my blog.

First I would like to thank my wife for inspiring me to write these entries and for getting me started on the blogging. I would also like to thank all of my students. You are the ones who have made the harmless thoughts blog popular, and you all have also inspired several entries. I would like to thank all of the people at blogger and the people at google who have supported me from the beginning with their easy to use programming. I would like to thank Stephanie and Emily for their awe-inspiring blogs. I would like to thank Miss Wiebe for inspiring so many others to take up the blogging challenge. I want to thank blogskins for the free designs that they offer. I would also like to thank amanda's announcement, emily's expressions, the random laugh, what's shakin' bacon, ... and the many other student bloggers. And whoever that other mattharmless is, I would like to thank him for his website, I just wish he would e-mail me back.

If you are one of my many visitors, please say hi on my tag-board, or feel free to e-mail me at mattharmless@hotmail.com

I love you all, God bless.

ED-u-CA-shun kwotes

The test and the use of man's education is that he finds pleasure in the exercise of his mind.
--Jacques Martin Barzun

As far as the laws of mathematics refer to reality, they are not certain; and as far as they are certain, they do not refer to reality
--Albert Einstein

The mediocre teacher tells. The good teacher explains. The superior teacher demonstrates.The great teacher inspires.
--William Arthur Ward

Mathematics is a game played according to certain simple rules with meaningless marks on paper.
--David Hilbert

Mathematics is written for mathematicians.
--Nicholaus Copernicus

Example isn't another way to teach, it is the only way to teach.
--Albert Einstein

Teaching is not a lost art, but the regard for it is a lost tradition.
--Jacques Barzun


Anyone who cannot cope with mathematics is not fully human. At best he is a tolerable subhuman who has learned to wear shoes, bathe and not make messes in the house.
--Lazarus Long, "Time Enough for Love", (Robert A. Heinlein)

Do not worry about your problems with mathematics, I assure you mine are far greater.
--Albert Einstein

I think of lotteries as a tax on the mathematically challenged.
--Roger Jones

I will try not to give any more quotes for a while. You will have to thank my wife for getting me started on the quotes. She was the one who was showing all of these to me. If you would like to find some other quotes, I got them all from quotes exchange.

October 14, 2003

some luv quotes

The most important thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother.
--Theodore M. Hesburgh

Platonic love is like an inactive volcano.
--Andre Pevost

If you love something, set it free; if it comes backs it's yours, if it doesn't, it never was
--Richard Bach

It is not how much we do, but how much love we put in the doing. It is not how much we give, but how much love we put in the giving.
--Mother Teresa

The quality of love and the duration of a relationship are in direct proportion to the depth of the commitment by both people to making the relationship successful. Commit yourself wholeheartedly and unconditionally to the most important people in your life.
--Brian Tracy

A mother's love for her child is like nothing else in the world. It knows no law, no pity, it dares all things and crushes down remorselessly all that stands in its path
--Agatha Christie (1890 - 1976)

You come to love not by finding the perfect person, but by seeing an imperfect person perfectly.
--Sam Keen

Love is a gift of one's inner most soul to another so both can be whole
--Tea Rose

October 12, 2003

my friend "son 1"

(I know this is a long entry, I'm very sorry, but nobody is making you read it... right?)

Every once in awhile you might see something in your kids that reminds you of yourself. That happened to me today while I sat and watched Sam.

We were sitting in the McDonald's play park area today. We had just had lunch. (2 happy meals, ketchup only, milk to drink; 1 extra value meal #1, diet coke) and while I was letting Son 2 chew on some fries, I sat and watched Son 1.

While I was watching him I noticed that he went from kid to kid, saying little things, trying to get them to follow him down the slide or chase him through the tunnels. He was looking for a friend. Now Son 1 is picky about a lot of things, but when it comes to his friends, it doesn't seem to matter what they look like or who they are. Normally it is the first kid that will play with him. (I have watched him do this several times.)

Most of the time it is a younger kid that he ends up playing with. He might start with the older kids, but they are usually too wrapped up in their own little worlds to take much notice of him. I will watch him bring up something small, about the slide or a tunnel, or maybe something that he has currently been playing with (like hotwheels or swords). After a few attempts, the kid walks away, while Son 1 is left alone. He will usually go down the slide a few times by himself, until he runs into another kid. Then the process begins again.

Sometimes I will see him try to join in with a group of kids. After being ignored and snubbed for a while, he will move on. Every once in a while a kid will take notice of him, and will play with him for a while, until they see something else and move on. Sam will follow the kid around for a little bit. The kid will usually act like he is an annoyance; usually what Son 1 is talking about is little and trivial, and might seem like silly talk to the kid. Eventually Sam gets the idea and begins to look elsewhere for friendship.

The parent in me wants to go over to those kids and convince them that Son 1 is a great kid and that they would enjoy playing with him. But the real loving parent in me knows that I need to stay out of the way.

Eventually he finds some small kid that is just as eager to find a friend as he is, and just as eager to enjoy the little, trivial, and silly things of their small existence in the play park. Then they will play together until something more exciting distracts the kid or the parent takes the kid away. Either way, I have yet to see Son 1 walk away from the newfound friendship (unless I make him because I am tired of sitting in McDonalds).

Once Son 1 finds a friend, he has a friend for life, at least as far as Son 1 is concerned. I have seen him, on many an occasion, get ignored or rejected by someone he was looking forward to seeing. It was someone that he would refer to as "...my friend, ___________." And once he was reunited with his friend, the kid would act like he had never seen Son 1 before.

He is still young enough to not feel too much the cuts and hurts of life. It seems that his young naive mind is still protecting him from the painful attacks of human existence. But it won't be long. Everyday that goes by his memory gets stronger, and his understanding level increases. I know that I have very young memories of this exact thing. I can still remember, like it was yesterday, the many attempts to be friends with different kids, and the painfulness of those rejections.

Even though the years have changed me in many ways, I still think that I am just like Son 1 in this area. It was very interesting, watching myself, through my son.

Son 1 is one of my best friends. I hope that the things that interest him will never be too little, trivial, or silly for me. When the world rejects him, I want him to always know that he has a safe place with me. And I desperately want to point him to the friend, who although his ways are higher than our ways, is never too busy to stop and call us his friends.

October 11, 2003

some quotes

"When you die, you will leave everything you have --- you will take everything you are."
- Dr. Bob Taylor

"You can't take it with you --- but if you could, it would melt where some of you are going."
- Billy Sunday

"When I consider the cross and what He did, how can I consider anything I do as sacrifice."
- Amy Carmichael

October 8, 2003


"...and may the best man win."

A Word from the wife

o.k....not many funny things have happened to me lately, but I have to grin when I reflect on this one. The song listed below is by Rich Mullins, and I have found great comfort in it for many years. It has been a balm to me through fear, depression, loss, mistakes and heartbreak. The ironic, or maybe not so much ironic, thing about the deal is that I have been singing a line of it wrong the whole time. SO, I get on here to blog about it and find that the word I have been belting out in the car IS NOT THERE!!! Anyway, my favorite line is....
"He's been there before and he knows what it's like...you'll find He's there."

I have been under the belief that it says..."You'll find ease there." Frankly, I like my version better and I know that if Rich were still here he would change it for sure. I know this because after years of listening to this artist's music, I sense we have identical hearts...at least in the early, 20- something, "I'm going to do this my way" years. I find myself running to the Truth in his songs because they bring me so much comfort. The kind of comfort that comes only by truly "relating" to something.

So, I was thinking about the things that bring "ease" to me. My friends grin when I call myself someone who "camps in unhappiness", but it's so true. I guess, I'm just learning as of late why that is, but regardless, I find myself needing ease quite a bit. A good nights sleep, a hot bath, chicken noodle soup, tylenol....in high doses, a friend's voice, quiet, sunshine, a back rub, paid bills, vacation....all of these bring great ease, but they are so temporary. They come and go based on time and opportunity. I think that's the key to my position of mayor in the town of unhappiness. But, a constant "ease" in my life is God. I fight going...I fight the terms of how to get there, I fight with tightly clenched fists, but when I get low and I see who I am and I see even clearer who He is..yep, there it is...ease.

Bound To Come Some Trouble

There's bound to come some trouble to your life
But that ain't nothing to be afraid of
There's bound to come some trouble to your life
But that ain't no reason to fear
I know there's bound to come some trouble to your life
But reach out to Jesus, hold on tight
He's been there before and He knows what it's like
You'll find He's there

There's bound to come some tears up in your eyes
That ain't nothing to be ashamed of
I know there's bound to come some tears up in your eyes
That ain't no reason to fear
I know there's bound to come some tears up in your eyes
Reach out to Jesus, hold on tight
He's been there before and He knows what it's like
You'll find He's there

Now, People say maybe things will get better
People say maybe it won't be long
And people say maybe you'll wake up tomorrow
And it'll all be gone
Well I only know that maybes just ain't enough
When you need something to hold on
There's only one thing that's clear

I know there's bound to come some trouble to your life
But that ain't nothing to be afraid of
I know there's bound to come some tears up in your eyes
That ain't no reason to fear
I know there's bound to come some trouble to your life
Reach out to Jesus, hold on tight
He's been there before and He knows what it's like
You'll find He's there

October 7, 2003

Ode to spaghetti

with your red tomato sauce
and your long lovely noodles,
you remind me of sweaters
on little white poodles.

O I love to eat you
(not referring to the canines,
but to those lovely noodles
with the ground up bovines.)

I'll poke my fork in
and give a little twirl,
splattering tiny red dots,
all over that girl,

sitting right beside me
in her dress shirt of white
looking extremely mad
and overflowing with spite.

She doesn't love you spaghetti
the exact way I do
when at the restaurant
she never orders you

In fact, I think she's leaving,
"Hey where you goin',
don't you like spaghetti,
with the cheese overflowin'?"

Well, there she goes
the women are always leavin'
while into my mouth
spaghetti mounds I'm heavin'.

-me

October 3, 2003

October 1, 2003

A favorite Psalm

Psalm 62

1 My soul finds rest in God alone;
my salvation comes from him.
2 He alone is my rock and my salvation;
he is my fortress, I will never be shaken.

3 How long will you assault a man?
Would all of you throw him down-
this leaning wall, this tottering fence?
4 They fully intend to topple him
from his lofty place;
they take delight in lies.
With their mouths they bless,
but in their hearts they curse.
Selah

5 Find rest, O my soul, in God alone;
my hope comes from him.
6 He alone is my rock and my salvation;
he is my fortress, I will not be shaken.
7 My salvation and my honor depend on God;
he is my mighty rock, my refuge.
8 Trust in him at all times, O people;
pour out your hearts to him,
for God is our refuge.
Selah

9 Lowborn men are but a breath,
the highborn are but a lie;
if weighed on a balance, they are nothing;
together they are only a breath.
10 Do not trust in extortion
or take pride in stolen goods;
though your riches increase,
do not set your heart on them.

11 One thing God has spoken,
two things have I heard:
that you, O God, are strong,
12 and that you, O Lord, are loving.
Surely you will reward each person
according to what he has done.

September 30, 2003

maybe its her eyes

maybe its her eyes, so warm, so blue.
maybe not at all,
I don't know, but I love her.

maybe its her face, beautiful, but stern.
maybe its not that,
I'm not sure, but I love her.

maybe its her ears, attentive, and careful.
could be something else,
I can't say, but I love her.

maybe its her lips. forming kisses and instructions.
not sure if this is it,
it could be, why I love her.

maybe its her laughter, rich and full, ever contagious
though I strive to hear it,
even sorrow, helps me love her.

maybe its her hands, gentle and helpful
working until weary,
even lazy, I always love her.

could it be her wit? so quick, so sharp
I'd hate to do without it,
but without it, I'd still love her.

maybe its her body, I can't deny it, I sure like it.
it only got me started,
toward the reasons, why I love her.

maybe shes so smart, she'd never say it, but its true.
I couldn't know so much,
but I know, I still love her.

maybe its her love, steadfast... though shaken
though I couldn't bear to lose it,
its not the reason, why I love her.

maybe its the person, the full package, all the contents.
though I never really know for sure,
all the reasons, all the answers,
its all I want to do,
to shout it, to scream it,
to tell her, I love her.

September 28, 2003

our world

we live in a real world,
a world that wants to tear us apart,
a world of hate,
sin, and deception.
our world.

we exist in this phase of reality,
and no matter what people say or want
or believe, here we are.
in our world
some people get hurt
and some people die;
some people strive for things
their whole life...
and never get them,
our world.

in our world
many people will give 110% ...
and lose; a quarter back
might throw his last great pass of his career,
and watch it be intercepted,
the sun will go up
and the sun will go down
and justice will never be seen
by some; while others may never
see their rescuer arrive or
experience the hero
of the story riding in to
save the day.
our world.

in our world
many people live very lonely lives.
some people never get
that second chance to make things right.
while others may live and never know love
or true friendship
our world, our home.

this is our world,
this is where we live
and this is what we face
there is no getting around it.
our world, our destiny?

but why?
why does it have to be
this way? why are things hard?
why must i face it?
why... why... why...
our world, why?

the why has been answered
in times long past. our world
was not intended to be this way,
and it never should have been...
but it is, why?
why, is not the question.
why, is just a complaint,
it is a child's cry, a baby's whimper,
a lame excuse.
because the why has been answered.
we are the reason why.
we are the cause of the hurt
and the pain and the hardship
and the loneliness. we are the cause
we are the reason why
our world, is us!

ahh, yes... but don't give in,
don't fall into despair or sorrow
for there is hope...
there is escape from this world
there is escape from this vapor,
this passing mist. but those trapped
in this world won't see it
they refuse to accept this world
for what it really is.
is it reality? is it for sure?
is this the scope of our existence?
is there a chance for us?
a chance to exist the way it should have been?
yes...
in our world

O what a hope we have
for our great creator has offered us
an escape from ourselves.
to die to what we were,
and to become
what we should have been,
to be made alive and right and
what we should have been to begin with
and even though we live in
a harsh reality, there is something
more real, more solid, more lasting.
where the lonely have a friend,
where the heartsick
are delved into an overwhelming love,
where there is someone
always paying attention
and is outraged at their losses
where the hurt and bleeding
have hope and comfort and healing,
where they can exist in another world
while walking around here
in ours
our world, not our home

September 25, 2003

a song for son 1 and son 2

O my son,
You were born in a world that hates you,
And I swear I will never forsake you,
But there was a Father centuries ago
Who watched His beloved Son die.

O my son,
I am weak and I'm trembling,
For the Lord I am always remembering.
O what a strong shepherd holds you in His arms!
He'll break you and make you His own,
and then take you home.

Well, if I could I would protect you
from what you will see.
This world may promise love and beauty
but it lied to me.
And I will show you,
if you will listen,
And I will promise
to listen, too.

Yes, there are some who love the lies.
They will kill you if they can,
Though you speak the truth in love.
They will hate you like The Man -- Jesus.
Although He was God,
He allowed Himself broken for you.

And, if I could I would protect you
from what you will see.
This world just might seem so alive
but it's dead to me.
And I will teach you,
if you will hear me,
And I will promise
to hear you, too.

O my son,
I am only your brother.
For a sister, God gave me you mother.
But just like the mother so long ago
Had to watch her beloved Son die,
O son, we will try to let you go.

(---Keith Green)

September 22, 2003

a quote

a quote
"Love is not primarily a feeling, Love is a conscious choice to seek to meet the needs of others..."
- Steve Viars

September 20, 2003

the boys

the boys
7:00 am - woke up to the noise of the boys

7:45 am - the boys finished off the package of extra large honey buns which I purchased for myself

8:30 am - left with the boys to go to Wal-Mart to get an oil change on the van

9:45 am - have looked at shoes, clothes, toys, tools, garden supplies, and a few other things... the van is almost done

10:00 am - on our way to Columbian Park, after finding out that the oil could not get changed on the van because they have a policy that says that they cannot change the oil if there is a rubber temporary plug in the oil pan... oh well

11:45 am - played at the park and looked at the animals; on our way to McDonald's for some burgers, fries, drinks, and the playpark

1:00 pm - leaving McDonald's to go home

altogether a good day... I love those boys

September 19, 2003

my friend

Last night as I was on my way to bed, I stopped by my son's room. I went inside and saw that he was still awake (as usual) so I crawled into bed beside him.

All evening he had been asking me to play with him... I never did. I had been "too tired" or "too busy" or "talking to mommy" or lame excuse, lame excuse, lame excuse...

After I crawled into bed with him, he snuggled up to me. I whispered in his ear, "I am so sorry that I didn't play with you tonight." I was getting ready to say some more, but before I could, he reached over and put his hand on my face, and said, "That's ok daddy, I forgive you."

We talked for a little while longer, and then I went to bed. It was a sweet moment that I won't forget for a long time.

Even though I don't think of him this way very often, he is not only my son, he is also one of my truest friends.

I usually don't use absolute words, but let me tell you a couple of "always" things about Sam...

He ALWAYS wants to be with me.
He is ALWAYS happy to see me.
He is ALWAYS sad when I have to leave.
He is ALWAYS sorry when he has been wrong.
He ALWAYS forgives me when I have been wrong.
He will now and ALWAYS love me no matter what.

I will ALWAYS love "Son #1". He is one of my truest friends.

grace

"Those who cling to worthless idols forfeit the grace that could be theirs."

- Jonah (from inside the belly)

September 16, 2003

I love...

I love...
green VW beetles
passing notes in class
driving around until 2:00 in the morning
staying up really, really late watching movies
and hanging out with friends
... because I love you.

I love...
long distance relationships
driving far to watch a late movie
giving instructions on driving a stick
writing extra long love letters
and paying huge phone bills
... because I love you.

I love...
sleeping two hours a day
working all hours of the night
trips to Chicago
a band called Worm
and learning about Keith & Rich
... because I love you.

I love...
working third shift
taking care of a whining puppy
stopping by the office with snacks & root beer
sleeping 4 hours a night
and eating mexican food for breakfast
... because I love you.

I love...
five and a half hour drives
going to school & skipping chapel
meeting new friends
sleeping 5 hours a night
changing diapers
watching movies whenever there's time
being poked with a needle
crying, laughing, praying
exhaustion... depression... completion...
and moving on
... because I love you

I love...
mini vans
getting up early
rock ballads & Chicago's greatest hits
putting the soap in the soap dish
working long and hard
baby sitters
staying up kinda late watching movies
empty wallets, beat up cars
and growing
... because I love you.

I love...
the empty nest
the passing years
a few gray hairs
a few extra pounds
and watching movies early in the evening
... because I love you.

I love...

... because I love you.

September 15, 2003

Don't it figure....

"As punishment for my contempt for authority, Fate has made me an authority myself."
--Albert Einstein

September 14, 2003

those of the type artistic

The artistic types are very
very interesting, they always seem
to have that most interesting
thing to say, and they seem

to be able to word things in a way
that is most fitting
to any situation,
and when they have fully expressed
themselves you sit back

and admire their thinking.
The only problem is
that when you truly begin
to ponder, the pondering begins
to reveal that in reality
their depth is absolutely
full of shallow.

The artistic types have fooled us all.
For the most part they know nothing
of reality. Theirs is one
that could never exist
and should never exist.
Where true love is rare
and spirituality a gift.

The artistic types have fooled us all.
The real is composed of dirt and sweat,
blood, difficulty and grossness,
choices, boredom,
and beauty.

In the real,
true love and spirituality
are a choice away
there they are
just sitting there waiting
to have coffee with you
and wondering when
you will stop hitting
the snooze button.

the real is me
the real is you
the real is God
the real is tears
and years of joy
the real is a vanilla coke
after Sunday night church.

Those of the type artistic have fooled us all.

I think that the artistic type has fooled me for the last time.

September 12, 2003

A Moment...

Have you ever had a moment of clarity?

You know, one of those fleeting moments when all of the vain/empty things of life seem to fade away. That one sweet moment when all of the important things of life come into perfect focus. When absolute truth reigns in your mind and you have a true vision of reality.

You relish in it and have that dreamers hope that that moment will stay.

I wish I could have one of those. They sound nice.

September 11, 2003

jr. high boys p.e.

i teach jr. high boys p.e.
and one of my favorite sites to see
is when they run
oh boy, its fun
to teach jr. high boys p.e.
- me

September 10, 2003

What do you love?

I love what I do, because I choose to love it.

Why do you love the things that you love? Why do you think the things that you think?

Have you ever even asked yourself these questions?

Just a thought...